Is what my kids do a lot – it has to be! Why else when I call them, ‘a thousand times’, and tell them to do something, they ignore me and keep on doing whatever it is they are doing, i.e., watching television, playing a game, playing with dolls, etc.; when I get testy, i.e., call their names out in full, raise my voice and demand that they do as I say or else, then they look sheepish and scramble to do what I asked them to do, saying “I didn’t hear you mommy”!
Yeah right! My response is usually, “Do we not speak the same language?” “Did you not hear me call you the first time?” The response is always a resounding yes!
I think at one point or another we as adults do the same thing too. We do it to our children and to each other. If we don’t hear what we want to hear, we pretend not to hear, we zone out and leave the person speaking to you ‘hanging’, in essence, having a conversation by themselves!
My daughter (number 1) did that to me recently. We were in Target and I was talking, to her rambling since I was going on and on from one topic to another. We were walking down the aisle, she turned off without saying something and I thought she was behind me and so as I selected what I needed, I was having a conversation, one-sided, but a conversation non the less. She later told me that people were staring at me and probably thought I was crazy! I burst out laughing at that, because it painted quite a visual to my mind and I thought it was funny! Hopefully the people around me didn’t think I was crazy, but since I usually talk to myself anyway, it didn’t faze me at all!
Sometimes I’m at work and I’m busy, someone stops by my desk, pleasantries exchanged, and we’re supposed to go on with what is at hand. There’s one particular person who doesn’t know when to shut up. I usually end up half listening to her as I get my work done. So yes, I do it too.
Or the times I’m so into my movies, or television program and one of my kids would come to have a conversation; they know not to do this during movie times. It’s not that I do not find time for them, but I want to have some time too, to do the things I like to do (watching TV is the most I can do sometimes) but that gets interrupted quite often. I often tell them to see me during the commercial break and they do!
One way or the other though, we all do this at some point or another. It’s not nice when you do it to someone and it’s certainly not nice when they do it to you. We’re learning day by day to be better listeners, but we do end up breaking the rules sometimes!