My pet peeve

Observations and a question….

Published on June 21, 2006 By foreverserenity In Blogging

Thanks to Little Whip, my inspiration to post the article that I wrote similarly to this one she posted today, Link.

I responded on her blog that we were thinking along the same lines because I had written my article but hadn't posted it as yet. Partly because I didn't want to come off as whiny or something else. I wondered at it and decided to write about one of my pet peeves.

___________________--

What is it that makes you not respond, when someone makes a comment on your blog? I’m just wondering. If someone takes the time to read and make a comment why not just say, hey you thanks for stopping by. Or anything non-committal or something. Just an acknowledgement, even a smiley face or something to let the reader know that you acknowledge their presence?

I’ve blogged on this a long time ago and I’ve seen others ask this very same question. Isn’t that just common courtesy? Should there be Blog ethics for everyone to see?

I’m not mad at anyone (you know me, I love asking questions, and I’m in your face with it!); I’ve just noticed a trend with some people.

It’s a given that everyone gets busy with their daily lives, and some people will courteously note when they’re tied up or won’t be able to respond right away etc. [And this is not to have everyone “on their toes” prefacing everything they write with whether they will respond or not].

You and I know that one of the thrill of blogging is when someone actually reads your blog and respond to it. Of course you didn’t beg them to come on your blog, but isn’t that why we’re here? We’re conversating (yea, newly made up word! That or showing my ghettoness!LOL!) in a round-about kind of way.

I think it’s akin to saying “Good morning” to someone out of courtesy and being ignored! There are times when I don’t get to my own Blogs right away, but I usually will say something, as do some of you.

I say just go ahead and don’t allow someone to respond to your Blog then, especially if you don’t like that person. Or just tell them they’ve been cut off for whatever reason, at least I hope you’ll have the courtesy to give the reason why they’re on your shit list or you don’t like their company anymore.

Anyway, I’m just wondering, and thought I would ask.

Comments (Page 1)

Trudygolightly

on Jun 21, 2006

For myself, I LOVE to see comments after taking time to write about something. I try to respond to all comments, even though it was suggested by Brad's article about blogging says different. I suppose I could link it here, do imagine tho that most bloggers have read his article on blogging...

I DO have one article on which I know I didn't respond to ANY comments, as I wasn't looking for any conversation about the article, not sure if I prefaced it though with a disclaimer..........comments WERE welcome though....it was too close to my heart to try to carry on any debate about the subject.

I don't really enjoy blacklisting anyone, I've done blacklisting to 3 rude men, one made a lewd suggestive type comment, and I don't like the tone of his articles, replies to others, so ya he's bckld. One guy would't quit egging me on after I politely asked him to, and the other guy has been just plain rude to me. Does blacklisting trolls count? don't we all try to keep them at bay? I had unblacklisted a couple of gals so they could reply if they wanted to.

Sometimes I write an article, then am gone from home for the day and might not get back to it til the next day, however try to answer all. The ones I don't answer are usually the ones that are yelling at me, or out of control with their emotions ( which I've gotten sometimes too) . I to debate things in a mild way, and some people are the opposite. It isn't that I don't like debating, I just don't like it when we get out of hand with how we react, instead of just proving a point.

Well that's more than I planned on writing!!

Texas Wahine

on Jun 21, 2006

I have a bad habit of abandoning my threads.

Here's the low down:

I like getting lots of different comments from different people. It's fun to know that someone read what I wrote and it made them think of something that they wanted to share. So, I WANT lots of comments.

BUT

When I actually do get quite a few comments, I start feeling overwhelmed with all the replying I have to do. I'll read all the comments, chuckle to myself or whatever, and think about the replies my article has garnered, but when I start responding to all the comments I begin feeling mentally exhausted.

I don't know why this is. It's really stupid. And you know, if I would respond to comments as they came in, I could stay on top of things without having to devote a 20 minute stretch of time to responding and feeling so overwhelmed.

I do the same thing with email.

So here's an official apology to everyone I've neglected. I will try to be better.

Tova7

on Jun 21, 2006

It is rude and the fastest way to let someone know you don't like them without actually having the guts to say it to their cyber face.

So its a passive aggressive type thing. OR the person is just so self absorbed they don't care what people have to say.....either way, not generally someone I would waste my comments on too often.

island_gurl12

on Jun 21, 2006

I hope I'm not guilty of this! heh, actually I dont think I am, but i'll be careful just in case. I'm sometimes ignored too, but most of the time it's because my comment wasnt insightful to start with, lol! But a little thanks for stopping by is always nice to read

KellyW0498

on Jun 22, 2006

Hey FS..

I hope I am not guilty of this either. I know this has happened to me sometimes when people have come to my blog after awhile and I didn't even know they were here.

Like you I love having comments and I try to acknoledge anyone making them. They took the time to say something about what I wrote and that means something.

That being said I don't have blogs that get a million comments.

amandapearl2

on Jun 22, 2006

Sometimes 5 people will comment and say the same thing with different words, so rather than responding to each one individually I may just lump them all into one. Plus I think it may be a bit redundant to say hey thanks! after every comment. If I don't have anything to add to the thread (even if it is on my blog) I won't comment.

foreverserenity

on Jun 22, 2006

the person(s) used to aknowledge my comments...but lately they seem to abandon ship altogether the moment I make an appearance.

That's weird isn't it?! Makes you wonder what's wrong with you or what ants got up their pants!LOL!

I'm sure I've failed to respond to you a time or two myself, FS, usually when you've arrived 'late to the party' and the thread has sunk out of my immediate sight and you have left a remark during a time I was not online so I didnt notice it until maybe weeks later when I might be going back through things for various reasons. By then it seems pointless to respond because the thread has already 'died.!'

LOL! Yea, I know there are sooo many times I'm late to the party!LOL! This made me laugh!hehee I will leave a comment even then though cause the article is interesting and deserves a response. But not to worry, I don't hold it against you.

Like you said, if your response to a blog is made in a timely manner, there's no reason why the person should not respond. If it's like three weeks down the road, well hey, anything goes!

i choose not to waste my time anymore

Ditto on this one Whip! I agree!

DO have one article on which I know I didn't respond to ANY comments, as I wasn't looking for any conversation about the article, not sure if I prefaced it though with a disclaimer..........comments WERE welcome though....it was too close to my heart to try to carry on any debate about the subject.

In a case like this Trudy, prefacing it would have been good or marking it private would help too.

Does blacklisting trolls count? don't we all try to keep them at bay?

I think we all hate trolls, for sure! I've had a few weird response on mine before too and I usually tell them to quit it or else.

The ones I don't answer are usually the ones that are yelling at me, or out of control with their emotions ( which I've gotten sometimes too) . I to debate things in a mild way, and some people are the opposite. It isn't that I don't like debating, I just don't like it when we get out of hand with how we react, instead of just proving a point.

I can understand how you feel about this Trudy. Nevertheless though, it's your blog, you have control and you should set the pace. That means if you have to pull it together and tell someone to quit "shouting" or straying from the point then you do that. If it becomes a heated debate, then you do still need to acknowledge so that person know that you got their response but dont' like where it's going or something like that. Anything to say, yea, I saw your comment but.....

Well that's more than I planned on writing!!

That's cool Trudy! You're welcome to write whatever your thoughts are on the topic!

Yep Tex, we all do.

I start feeling overwhelmed with all the replying I have to do. I'll read all the comments, chuckle to myself or whatever, and think about the replies my article has garnered, but when I start responding to all the comments I begin feeling mentally exhausted.

I can understand this! It is overwhelming at times to respond to so many at once.

don't know why this is. It's really stupid. And you know, if I would respond to comments as they came in, I could stay on top of things without having to devote a 20 minute stretch of time to responding and feeling so overwhelmed.

Ya know if you didn't have a busy life you would be able to do that! It's kind of impossible really unless you make the time to do it in an hour or something like that. But hey, you're pregnant and it's hard to sit for that long! I would have a hard time sitting that long while being pregnant!LOL!

So here's an official apology to everyone I've neglected. I will try to be better.

OK!

foreverserenity

on Jun 22, 2006

It is rude and the fastest way to let someone know you don't like them without actually having the guts to say it to their cyber face.

I like that Tova, "say it to they cyber face"! I think you've coined a new phrase!

OR the person is just so self absorbed they don't care what people have to say.....either way, not generally someone I would waste my comments on too often

Then they shouldn't make their blogs be open then! And I agree they don't need us wasting our times on them!

No way Em! I definately say if you made the time to stop by someone's blog and make a comment, then you also deserve to have a response no matter what!

Hey FS..

I hope I am not guilty of this either. I know this has happened to me sometimes when people have come to my blog after awhile and I didn't even know they were here.

In no way Kelly! I'm guilty as Whip says of being late to the party since I'm not on as often as I would like to be sometimes. And because I love reading you, you'll see random comments from me all over your blogs!LOL! Don't worry, if you dont' get the chance to go back to something you wrote ions ago, I won't feel slighted! I usually will leave a comment because I really liked the piece you wrote.

Like you I love having comments and I try to acknoledge anyone making them. They took the time to say something about what I wrote and that means something.

Exactly!

That being said I don't have blogs that get a million comments.

That I can agree with you on (where I'm concerned that is)!LOL!

I agree with you on this Amanda. I do the samething too. It would be ridiculous to only have thx, on each comment especially with nothing else to say after that!LOL!

_______

I split my response to these comments because everyone had a lot to say and I felt that each was important for me to respond to because the comments were so relevant!

And of course I didn't respond til today because I left work with a splitting migraine that left me totally immobile the whole evening and am just getting back to this blog!

So, yea, stuff happens to people and that's ok!

Moderateman

on Jun 22, 2006

don't really enjoy blacklisting anyone, I've done blacklisting to 3 rude men, one made a lewd suggestive type comment, and I don't like the tone of his articles, replies to others, so ya he's bckld. One guy would't quit egging me on after I politely asked him to, and the other guy has been just plain rude to me. Does blacklisting trolls count? don't we all try to keep them at bay? I had unblacklisted a couple of gals so they could reply if they wanted to.

which one was me trudy? you do remember blacklisting me right?

Moderateman

on Jun 22, 2006

Donna, sometimes I know I do not respond to each and every article you write {my bad} But it is difficult to read on those ocasions when I have my head buried up my own rear or little whips rear as some think. heh

Ms Mitchell

on Jun 22, 2006

I appreciated this. I'm new to blogging and I was ignorant of the etiquette. If you have read my stuff and I haven't responded, please accept my apologies. Thank you for teaching me what is expected in this culture.
Maggie

foreverserenity

on Jun 22, 2006

Donna, sometimes I know I do not respond to each and every article you write {my bad} But it is difficult to read on those ocasions when I have my head buried up my own rear

That's ok Elie. I know you have your good days and your bad days!

or little whips rear as some think. heh

That would be a sight to behold!

Reply By: Ms. MitchellPosted: Thursday, June 22, 2006I appreciated this. I'm new to blogging and I was ignorant of the etiquette. If you have read my stuff and I haven't responded, please accept my apologies. Thank you for teaching me what is expected in this culture.Maggie

You're welcome Maggie! I have read your stuff before. I must admit that when I try to find it again, I got lost. So I might be just as guilty as you!

Honestly, I don't even know why blacklisting was brought up, this article is about aknowledging comments, not why we choose to blacklist people or how to deal with trolls.

True.

If you have your article limited to registered users, you won't have anonymous trolls commenting in the first place

Good idea!

Tex, you probably do a better job of aknowledging every single participant on your threads than anyone i've seen in JU. You make an effort to respond to every single one most of the time, even if it's just a one-liner, and I've always admired you for that because I'm too lazy to do the same.

That she does!

InBloom

on Jun 22, 2006

It's funny because I complained about this very same thing once a long time ago. Since then, I've been guilty of this very same thing a couple of times...especially when it comes to responses made on old articles. I usually think that my subject has become tiresome by then, so I don't revive it by responding to the last post. For the most part, though, I try to respond to everyone, even if it is brief.

Trudygolightly

on Jun 22, 2006

which one was me trudy? you do remember blacklisting me right?

Honestly, I don't even know why blacklisting was brought up, this article is about aknowledging comments, not why we choose to blacklist people or how to deal with trolls.

Because it was said here:

"I say just go ahead and don’t allow someone to respond to your Blog then, especially if you don’t like that person. Or just tell them they’ve been cut off for whatever reason, at least I hope you’ll have the courtesy to give the reason why they’re on your shit list or you don’t like their company anymore."

The above paragraph was the last paragraph of the article....

Trudygolightly

on Jun 22, 2006

which one was me trudy? you do remember blacklisting me right?

None of those 3 were you, so that makes 4 men!
and now I do remember blacklisting you when you said something inappropriate. I believe, and I could be wrong, that it was in out of loyalty to another blogger.

I'd say more, however that would be a hijack I believe! right???

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