I was watching Hogan Knows Best, that reality show with Hulk Hogan and his family on VH1. The episode they showed was a repeat, one I kinda saw but didn't really watch in detail because of channel surfing. In the episode Hulk and his wife Linda are going through a bumpy road in their marriage and seeing a marriage counselor. Hulk said to the counselor that there have been times when they have had arguments and have said to each other that "maybe they should go their separate ways, get a divorce and just call it a day". The marriage counselor asked his wife, Linda, how did you feel when those words were said, she said, "scared".
Then Hulk said that he can't understand why is it that she, the wife, wants to do things on her own, why would she talk about something and just say "I" it leaves him and the kids out of the equation. Why would she want to go off and do things on her own, ride a horse, or anything? He can't do anything without thinking of the four of them its always "us" to him, not "I". The counselor then said to the wife, you are trying to find yourself, right? The wife, nodded and started tearing up. It's not that she doesn't love her husband or her children (who are older teens by the way), it's just that she wants to find who she is.
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That got me thinking that we women have it so difficult at times. I totally understand where she is and how she feels. It's not that she doesn't love her family, or her husband, she just wants to re-discover who she is! Most women are very devoted and dedicated to their kids and husbands, where is there time in the equation to fit "you" in? Why is it assumed that mom is happy just being mom, not that she isn't, but is she not to have any interests of her own and is she not to even take a moment for herself without feeling guilty for doing so?!
For many women, their family is their whole life, as it should be! But somewhere in the equation of marriage, kids, and living for your family, somehow, a wife's dreams get pushed aside and that might leave her feeling lost and frustrated.
Sometimes the man goes off earning a living, mom is left at home dealing with the children and life at home. Eventually as the years pass, the kids get older, they are not so in need of mom's interaction in their lives. Dad still has his interests, if mom didn't find the time to develop any of her own, she is left empty-handed. How does she pick up those pieces, what does she do next? Some women might not have a problem with this, but many do and will!
Do you think the Hulk was being selfish when he said he doesn't see why his wife wants to do anything on her own? I find that he was being that way. But not just selfish, he was scared, scared of her finding anything that will take her interest from him and in so doing, he would lose her. Some men are like that. They are afraid for their women to be more educated than them, being too attractive, so they are quite happy with their woman being out of shape, having friends they don't know. This is a reality for many couples!
The only way that a woman would want to be on her own permanently and call it quits in a relationship, that will happen only when she is tired of that relationship. When she feels she cannot go on anymore with the person she is with. However, I believe that many women just want the chance to have an interest other than the children, or the husband, or the home-life and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that! If a man feels threatened by his woman having outside interests, then they need to sit and talk about that or there won't be a moment of peace for both of them! So the Hogans did the right thing in seeking a marriage counselor! That is always a good step for any couple.